A strange and scary turkey hunt

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George

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I got all duded up in my colonial duds and hit the woods with evil intent in my heart toward the wild turkey yesterday morning. Any wild turkey, I was out to get any of them. Contrary to their reputation for stupidity, they easily smoked my plan and stayed far away, doing turkey stuff elsewhere. I was reluctant to give it up, after all I had rolled out of my nice warm bed before sunup, driven to hell and gone, hiked a quarter mile to my ambush spot, put out a beautiful hen decoy and worked my fingers to the bone on a box call telling every turkey in the county that I was lost and desperately needed company. Did they care? Not one whit. Dumber than they, I kept that up for three hours before admitting I had been outsmarted by a real birdbrain. Ah well, such is life. Reminded me of Ogden Nash:

The hunter crouches in his blind
'Neath camouflage of every kind,
And conjures up a quacking noise
To lend allure to his decoys.
This grown-up man, with pluck and luck,
Is hoping to outwit a duck.



Being the suspicious sort, I had come prepared for such a possibility. I hiked back to the car, traded my double flint 20 gauge for a single flint rifle shooting 175 balls to the pound, swapped shot pouches and set off in pursuit of the wily bushytail squirrel, gray or fox, I wasn’t feeling choosy. Deciding to do this was somewhat of a nervous experiment, because that little rifle has old-style sights, low silver blade front and low V rear. They can be difficult to see in poor lighting in the woods, and this old shooter’s eyes aren’t as young as they used to be. I wasn’t at all sure I could protect myself if I was charged by any squirrel at all. Screwing up my courage after making sure my scalping knife was handy and sharp as a backup, I ventured forth. It took a while, but I finally crossed paths with a really vicious looking gray squirrel in a tree about 20 yard away. Well aware of the danger if I only wounded it, I tried to get a bead on its head, but it knew what was up and kept constantly moving in the tree. I finally caught it still for an instant and tried the chest, instead, and was much relieved to see it come tumbling down. You should have seen the fangs on that thing! And it was a female, the fiercest kind. That was a close one.



To calm my nerves after that hair raising adventure, I made my way to a pond on the front 40 and fished awhile. Caught four small largemouth bass, and I’m eating a fried bass domburi as I pen this little tale. I’m lucky to be here to tell it. And to eat it.



Spence
 

Skychief

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Shoooo-wee partner....Glad ya came through it unscathed, at least physically. :thumbsup:

Good thinking, a blade for backup should be considered mandatory. :hmm:

Besides the long-fanged she-squirrel, were any dangers lurking in or around the pond, in which you found your meal?

Thanks for this account Spence and please continue to be careful "out there"!

Beautiful rifle by the way. I remember it and rarely have seen tighter striping. :thumbsup:

All the best, Skychief
 

jethro224

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Glad to hear you survived. It sounded like it was pretty close there for a while.
 
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Life has taught you well our good friend, especially she devils, sorry, squirrels, did I say that out loud!

That there rifle has a tiny bore, lying in bed dosed up for influenza I can not do the math, is it .30"?

Will you try for the turkey again?
Boy it would be good to have turkey here.

B :hatsoff:
 

dhaverstick

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Don't tell that tale to any trick-or-treaters, you'll have them too scared to ever set foot in the woods! Thanks for sharing, though.

Darren
 

The Baron

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Hair raising! :shocked2: For your own welfare, I'd strongly recommend a brace of .75 pistols in your belt next time you venture into the lion's den. :haha:
 

George

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Britsmoothy said:
That there rifle has a tiny bore, lying in bed dosed up for influenza I can not do the math, is it .30"?

Will you try for the turkey again?
Yes, a .30. If there was ever a rifle perfectly designed for a job and perfect at doing it, it's that little one. It's too bad it's not more popular.

Probably won't try the turkeys again. Things have changed on my old farm so much I don't think there's much there to attract then any more. There is another season in December, so I'll be tempted to change my mind then.

Flu is the pits, isn't i?. Sorry you are down, Brits, get well quick.

Spence
 
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Deep in the baygalls of the Southeast Texas swamp I grew up in , one never knew what horror awaited in the dimmed, filtered light that wove around the ancient and indifferent forest. Who could have guessed the razor fanged danger lurking above one's head on the silent tree limbs, waiting to drop like the shadow of death on the unwary trespasser in their unholy and jealously guarded realm. Thanks, Spence, for reminding me of that vast and darkened place in the comprehensive hell of my memories, where many ventured bravely forth, never to return again. May you be safe in you trekking from the awful screams of Squirrilus Carolinensis, and may your footsteps be always towards the light and happy escape from that cunning and depraved predator, whose thirst for the blood of Man is unequaled in this mortal clime. Your humble emulator in the Woods Beyond the Gate, George.
 

hanshi

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The Baron makes a good point. It is foolhardy to go out after carnivorous rodents without having a heavy caliber pistol with you.
 

George

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Spikebuck said:
Be cautious not only of those large-fanged squirrels, but also of titling something "Strange and Scary" and then having the first thing a reader sees a big picture of yourself! :wink: :grin:
A perfect example of truth in advertising. :haha:

Spence
 
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George said:
Britsmoothy said:
That there rifle has a tiny bore, lying in bed dosed up for influenza I can not do the math, is it .30"?

Will you try for the turkey again?
Yes, a .30. If there was ever a rifle perfectly designed for a job and perfect at doing it, it's that little one. It's too bad it's not more popular.

Probably won't try the turkeys again. Things have changed on my old farm so much I don't think there's much there to attract then any more. There is another season in December, so I'll be tempted to change my mind then.

Flu is the pits, isn't i?. Sorry you are down, Brits, get well quick.

Spence
Your little .30 :hatsoff:
Thank you and God bless.

B.
 

robinsroost

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:bow: Congratulations Spence on surviving that strange and dangerous ordeal, we are so glad your aim was true. I like your turkey decoy, I had one like her but, alas she did not make the trip from Tennessee to Indiana. Squirrels are tenacious of life and so dangerous, as you well know, if they weighed 100 pounds it would not be safe to venture outside...........robin
 
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Brokennock

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Thank you for your wonderful, harrowing, tale. I paid for the whole seat but only needed the edge.

That is one sweet little rifle. Glad you and it escaped that shadowy realm.

If you keep posting all these great pictures of the excellent Japanese cuisine you turn fish and game into, maybe you could include recipe/instructions? You've taught us so much thus far. Maybe another chapter in the required reading book, "Things I've Learned from Spence."


My :hatsoff: sir, And thank you.
 

Wes/Tex

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Hope this little tale of hope and glory makes it's way to your page of daring do and tons of info! :wink: Know the feeling compadre...I really do. Spent one season bound and determined to get venison but it all went south...mainly due to the efforts of one insane squirrel who came to be known as Yodels. He spent every day I was out there jumping about and chattering...never have I ever seen this behavior, but he took a sudden dislike to moi! Where ever I went he was near and I was so determined to get venison and should have turned him into stew...but no! It got to be cute after a while and the last day he got in a tree above me and dropped acorns on me. It was a season for the ages and I got nada for the year. His antics were so wonderful, in hind sight, I've gone back several times and left cracked sacks of pecans!
And can also say turkeys are not easy either. Waited one out one day buried in home made camo like a ghillie suit...sort of. Was also in a pile of limbs and under a short hill county cedar but as soon as a hen stepped into the open she looked my way, let out a cackle and they all went south! No idea what she could possibly have seen but it was like the old story about the Tonkawa hunter who told the lady that soon as a turkey saw him it was, "Injun, by God!!" Good luck in December...you'll need it! :haha: :thumbsup:
 

Zonie

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Wes
It's pretty obvious what caused the turkey to leave.

Just above you and to your right was this fat squirrel, flicking its tail while it pointed down at you yelling in high frequency, "Wildtalk" that people can't hear,

"THERE HE IS!! :shocked2:

THE HUNTER, DRESSED IN THAT DUMB RAGGED SUIT! :shake:

DON'T YOU SEE HIM? HE'S THAT DUMB LOOKING BUSH RIGHT THERE.

RUN!

RUN!

RUN AWAY!!!

And leave my pecans alone. Their mine."

:rotf:
 

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