I don't have a 42nd button on the cockade yet but it will probably be in the works. I just haven't quite found evidence yet of when exactly the numbered buttons started, that's why I just went with plain buttons on the regimental. But I think a numbered button on the cockade would look good!Oh and yes, I agree with getting a smaller toorie when possible. Do you have a 42nd button on the cockade?
Yes, you can get away with more "styling" as an Officer.
One Lady in our UnCivil War group made really excellent copies of Virginia Secession Ribbons for us. These look like a cockade on top with a VA button in them and a couple ribbon "tails" that hang down. It sort of got in the way on my chest, so I wore it on the left side of my Kepi like a Cockade. Wasn't sure how it would look, but I got a lot of compliments from the Ladies on it right away, so it stayed on my Officer's Kepi.